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Imlonely: How a YouTube music channel became a mental health hub - BBC News

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A gloomy photo of a man silhouetted against two windows with slatted blinds across them.
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Among the thousands of music channels on YouTube there is one like no other. Imlonely started as a musical diary for one person but became a mental health community providing support to thousands of young people going through their toughest times.

"What I'd name them actually is family," says Hunter, of the people who follow his Imlonely YouTube channel. "They feel like they're part of something."

Hunter, 23, from Wales, has anxiety and started to remix popular tracks and upload them to his channel depending on how he felt at the time.

"I just started it as a mood board for myself," he says. "My taste in music has always been based on feeling rather than genre."

But what started as a "hobby" rapidly grew. His mixes started to accumulate millions of views and hundreds of thousands of people subscribed to his channel, mostly aged between 13 and 24.

Sometimes his tracks created a relaxed mood like his mix of Best Part by Daniel Caesar while his Ariana Grande mix was uplifting - it was viewed seven million times.

People started to comment on his videos about how the songs resonated with them, sharing how they felt, and providing support to each other.

A photo of Ariana Grande from the shoulders up, she's at some kind of awards ceremony smiling into the camera.
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Almost by accident Hunter had created a space for members to be open about their feelings and mental health.

Just clicking on a video reveals a string of supportive comments: "It gets better", "You are amazing", "Keep going".

You don't have to scroll far to see who they're talking to. People share their struggles openly: "Is it just me who is all happy during the day but, when night comes, you let all of your emotion out? I'm crying every night at the moment and I don't know why."

Another reads: "I stayed up all night overthinking and beating myself up with no control over it but this [Imlonely] helped me calm down and focus."

One of those who turned to Imlonely is Monica, an 18-year-old student from the Philippines, who visited Imlonely for the music but says it got her through one of the toughest periods of her life.

"The community really helped me a lot, especially during 2019. That really was the worst year of my life, so my mental health was so unstable around that time."

A picture of Monica, an 18 year old woman, smiling into the camera.
Monica

At the beginning of 2019, Monica's little sister was diagnosed with chronic kidney disease and needed a transplant, which improved her health for a short time.

Soon after, however, her sister's health deteriorated and Monica had to administer dialysis and commit hours every day to her sister's care.

"I barely got sleep, barely got time for myself since I had to do so many things. One of the only things I could do though was listen to music.

"That's probably why the channel really helped me a lot. I couldn't forget the countless nights I had when I was awake at 03:00-04:00 running errands to buy medicine, listening to Imlonely's YouTube videos. It brought comfort to me."

At the end of 2019, Monica's sister passed away, leaving Monica "at the lowest of my lows".

But the channel continued to be a source of comfort and she now says she wants to be happy for her sister.

"I'm really happy to say that the channel has really helped me a lot. It brought me comfort and happiness around the time when I was so depressed and helpless. I've also realised that in the littlest things, one can truly be happy, so I'm glad that I found the channel."

Hunter knows from the statistics YouTube provides that he has a young audience, and he thinks this is what has brought so many people together.

"A lot of people don't have anyone to talk to at home or school," he says. "They'll vent about problems they're having with friends or parents. Personally, if I had something like that, back when I was younger, I feel like I wouldn't have had anywhere near as many problems as I did with feeling anxious and not talking about it."

Dr John Naslund, an instructor in global health and social medicine at Harvard Medical School, has researched peer-to-peer support on social media and studied groups similar to Imlonely.

"One of the first studies I did was to look at the comments posted on these types of YouTube videos, to break down some of the misconceptions that it's entirely a negative environment, actually, there's really, really positive energy on these groups."

He says interactions like these can help "destigmatise" mental health and that for many people "going online and finding stories of other people who've had similar experiences can be incredibly validating and inspiring".

These experiences are echoed by Morgan, a 17-year-old student from the UK, who came for the music but was drawn in by a community she identified with.

"I kinda (sic) fell down the rabbit hole of reading the comment section and realised there are so many people out there that I can relate to and those who encourage positivity. The comment section just has a nice vibe, it's comfortable, I guess? Like home."

A photo of Morgan, a 17 year old woman, smiling down the camera.
Morgan

Listening to the music helped her stay calm and have a "healthier mindset" but the comments left by the community helped show her other people were going through similar experiences.

"It opened my eyes a bit more and helped me distinguish between reality and my overthinking as well, because sometimes I assume everything is the worst it can be and my life is a shambles but then I realise it's not so bad after all and what I feel is more common than I thought.

"I'm not alone."

Spending time online talking to people about her experiences also encouraged Morgan to open up to some of her friends outside of the channel.

While Imlonely began life as an outlet for one person to express themselves it has become a global community of support.

For more disability news, follow BBC Ouch on Twitter and Facebook and subscribe to the weekly podcast on BBC Sounds.

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